Day 8 – All about the brain

So not the day I expected as I spent most of it in a hospital waiting room.  Safe from any activation or triggers you might think…but it is strange how the unexpected keeps on happening.  You might even start to think that the devil is deliberately setting you up to fail.

As I said, a hospital waiting area, very safe – if not a bit boring.  An hour into my wait and two women sit down opposite me and of course one is wearing something that sends dopamine thundering into my brain!  Totally out of my control and immediately I start thinking of ways that I can enjoy the view whilst keeping it ‘accidental’ and ‘not a sin’.  Yeah Right!!

Of all the empty seats, they chose directly opposite me – are you kidding!!  I deliberately sat so I didn’t have a view toward the entry and any new visitors and possible temptation.  If I had been on my own I would have moved but in this instance I couldn’t.  I felt uncomfortable and my body was giving me all of the ‘wrong’ messages.  In the end, despite several failed attempts not to look, I managed to divert myself using many of the techniques I discuss in the Self Help Units.

I still feel as though I failed and allowed myself to dwell too long on MY ‘occasion for sin’…but I do know I didn’t give in.  I kept on trying and I kept on recognising that the struggle was positive.  I also had a healthy reminder that temptations occur at the least expected moments.

SO BE READY

Now to Day 8 which is extremely relevant to today’s experience.

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My Conclusion:

You need to know the science to understand why addiction is so difficult to defeat.  Read everything about the brain and how the chemicals affect your decision making and sexual responses.  Another key challenge that you must complete.

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In the end the hospital visit worked out fine and all is well in the world.

Please be patient if you do not see your comment appear. I am having technical difficulties with the posts page so I am forced to manually pull your comments out of the ‘electronic bin’ and individually approve them.  So until that is sorted you will probably find a 24 hour delay.

Yours in Jesus, Mary & Joseph,

SA James